The doorbell rang just now, and the realisation that I haven't purchased a single treat for the all the kids scowling the streets had me feeling like a deer in front of a oncoming headlight.
I suppose at this age the responsibility of playing doormat host to all the trick-or-treater's doesn't come naturally. All I was thinking was; where the party is at? or which one of my friends is dressed like a slut tonight? Even preparing my sister's last year of trick or treating costume, never once did it occur to me that eventually, someone else's sister will be knocking on my door. I feel very ill-prepared.
When the house went 'ding-dong,' I was frozen with fear...then instinctively found the nearest wall and hugged it trying to hide myself from little pubescent sugar coons fearing that they might use their Halloween only XRAY vision to detect me.
So now I've shut all the curtains, switched off all the lights, and reduced anything that may stir a noise to utter silence. Hope, pray that nobody would egg my door. Sister says kids are better now and don't egg houses, but I'm still taking precautions.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Romantic clichés, and how I managed to ruin them.
Every one of my cliché romantic gesture has been ruined by untimely and inadvertent moves.
I remember the first time I gave a store bought rose to this Korean Woman, I think it was pink. This was a genuine gesture after seeing her for over 3 months. She was surprised and taken aback, and received it with slight hesitation. I don't understand where the awkwardness came from, considering our first official acquaintance was when I rolled over to her in the morning after a drunken party at a Markham Hotel. It was the most confusing friendship I have ever had with a Woman, where sometime it would be strictly platonic, other times she's lying beside me, clinched to my body rambling on about nonsense.
The friendship finally ended because of our abusive manner of communication. I would say something rash, and she pick up the nearest blunt object and beat me with it. I think that was when I swore off Korean Women. Perfectly good $20 rose wasted...and it was my first time. Damn it.
The was that time on the boat. A ship actually, with sails. The setting couldn't have been anymore romantic. An evening of fine dining and expensive wine and luxurious food. We got onto a landmark ship, and the vivid scene could have been straight out of a painting, or one of Shakespeare's plays. The situation was tense, and I we were trying to find something to talk about before I to kill the awkwardness. I began to lean in, almost half a year of semi-dating I was about to kiss her...and then she mentions her ex-boyfriend. The mood shatters like a broken mirror crumpling to the floor as in a cheap 80's romantic TV mystery drama. All I could see was the face of her ex-boyfriend. It was my last attempt at the perfect first kiss...after an amazing evening, on a sail ship. The relationship soon ended after that moment. The effort to nullify the romance in the months afterwards were completely tantalizing. So, no roses, or ships.
Then there was that Private schooled Woman of immense fortune. Loretto Abbey I think, that was her school. Perfect tightbody, long angel-like silky hair, reputable status, and an education that belittles every other Woman I dated. I had no idea what she saw in me, but she confess her feeling for me like I were the Duchess of Cornwall. It would have been the most romantic moment of my entire life, if only the Woman possessed an ounce of female intuition. She was the most perfect and beautiful robot I have ever encountered. Before I knew it, she had me sign my name in blood into a romantic contract. She announced her feelings, and I was obliged with utter silence. The Woman had such ambition that if I didn't...I would be fearing for my life.....even more.
We never ended up going on our first official date...because I kept coming up with excuses. To this day, I still fear straightforward ambitious Women. I'm not too picky am I?
What other clichés are there? Flowers? I meant it as a good gesture which ended up blowing in my face in a huge misunderstanding.
Jewellery? The girl thought I was coming onto her, I never had to fight off sex thrown at me at such force and high speed. I wasn't sure of my sexual orientation afterwards for a day or two.
The only things I got left are; confess my feeling and risking friendships, and killing the competition...
It's all good experience I suppose. The way which I communicate with Women are unparalleled. Seducing trollops at high-end establishments is child's play now. What an unfulfilled love life I have.
I remember the first time I gave a store bought rose to this Korean Woman, I think it was pink. This was a genuine gesture after seeing her for over 3 months. She was surprised and taken aback, and received it with slight hesitation. I don't understand where the awkwardness came from, considering our first official acquaintance was when I rolled over to her in the morning after a drunken party at a Markham Hotel. It was the most confusing friendship I have ever had with a Woman, where sometime it would be strictly platonic, other times she's lying beside me, clinched to my body rambling on about nonsense.
The friendship finally ended because of our abusive manner of communication. I would say something rash, and she pick up the nearest blunt object and beat me with it. I think that was when I swore off Korean Women. Perfectly good $20 rose wasted...and it was my first time. Damn it.
The was that time on the boat. A ship actually, with sails. The setting couldn't have been anymore romantic. An evening of fine dining and expensive wine and luxurious food. We got onto a landmark ship, and the vivid scene could have been straight out of a painting, or one of Shakespeare's plays. The situation was tense, and I we were trying to find something to talk about before I to kill the awkwardness. I began to lean in, almost half a year of semi-dating I was about to kiss her...and then she mentions her ex-boyfriend. The mood shatters like a broken mirror crumpling to the floor as in a cheap 80's romantic TV mystery drama. All I could see was the face of her ex-boyfriend. It was my last attempt at the perfect first kiss...after an amazing evening, on a sail ship. The relationship soon ended after that moment. The effort to nullify the romance in the months afterwards were completely tantalizing. So, no roses, or ships.
Then there was that Private schooled Woman of immense fortune. Loretto Abbey I think, that was her school. Perfect tightbody, long angel-like silky hair, reputable status, and an education that belittles every other Woman I dated. I had no idea what she saw in me, but she confess her feeling for me like I were the Duchess of Cornwall. It would have been the most romantic moment of my entire life, if only the Woman possessed an ounce of female intuition. She was the most perfect and beautiful robot I have ever encountered. Before I knew it, she had me sign my name in blood into a romantic contract. She announced her feelings, and I was obliged with utter silence. The Woman had such ambition that if I didn't...I would be fearing for my life.....even more.
We never ended up going on our first official date...because I kept coming up with excuses. To this day, I still fear straightforward ambitious Women. I'm not too picky am I?
What other clichés are there? Flowers? I meant it as a good gesture which ended up blowing in my face in a huge misunderstanding.
Jewellery? The girl thought I was coming onto her, I never had to fight off sex thrown at me at such force and high speed. I wasn't sure of my sexual orientation afterwards for a day or two.
The only things I got left are; confess my feeling and risking friendships, and killing the competition...
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Blending In
The mood to this blog is rather sad isn't it? I don't know who I'm speaking to because I don't actually know who reads this blog, if anyone read it. I thought I'd change the mood, from a slightly satirical cynicism kind of humour to something..happy. So I searched my computer for a happy photo, and this was the best I could do. I don't have happy photos, but since my perspective on life have changed during the last couple of months, I think my blog should too if I am to maintain it.
BTW, I must of missed this in computer class, nobody has ever taught me or said a thing; I never knew that you're supposed to leave two spaces between words after a period when typing. NEVER!
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Shame
My Mother just received Bei Bei's wedding photos, and of course she forwarded to me. Unbeknownst of the awkward and childish situation I've created between me, and the Woman in the photographs who is hugely responsible for shaping me into the person I am today.
It's been very difficult for me to browse through these photos of her on her wedding day, taken in the hometown of Qingdao. I see her happiness, and my inability to be happy for her simply because I disapprove of the husband. As if it was any of my business.
The future is unclear as to where this momentous occasion will take her. Will she stay in China? Or will she begin her married life with her husband in Holland? --where I possibly will never again lay eyes upon the Woman whom I owe my greatest debt?
Sorry Bei Bei, I've failed you as your younger brother who is supposed to support you.
It's been very difficult for me to browse through these photos of her on her wedding day, taken in the hometown of Qingdao. I see her happiness, and my inability to be happy for her simply because I disapprove of the husband. As if it was any of my business.
The future is unclear as to where this momentous occasion will take her. Will she stay in China? Or will she begin her married life with her husband in Holland? --where I possibly will never again lay eyes upon the Woman whom I owe my greatest debt?
Sorry Bei Bei, I've failed you as your younger brother who is supposed to support you.
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